Of Likes, Comments and Shares

I and my wife are both on Facebook and we share the same password. Sometime back she got angry with me and blocked me on Facebook. Then she called me using FaceTime from the other room and said “Hey dude, what’s up.” My reply was, I have already un-blocked myself and blocked you. Lol!

Being an author and winner of numerous awards in blogging, she is quite popular. So, whenever we are on vacation, my job is to take the best shots of her, so she can get the maximum number of likes and comments. Yes, I do track them more than my salary. In fact, over the last 1 year, the growth rate of ‘Likes’ has been 312% and of ‘Comments’ 274%. And, the number of ‘Shares’ on any status is n multiplied by m, where n is the number of likes and m is the number of comments, and both are in decimals.

Even our maid named Sameera back in India is on Facebook and she is connected to my wife. Few weeks back Sameera saw a picture of my wife sitting next to me on the front passenger seat in our car and she mentioned to my mother back in India that my wife was driving the car. Sameera didn’t know in US it is left side driving, unlike in India. But you see how much analysis people do.

As you can imagine, I also spend a good amount of time on Facebook, not using the word ‘addicted’ intentionally. You see, being a male, likes, comments and shares are very hard to get. No wonder, I really hate when my male friends only comment on a young lady’s picture – Beautiful, Lovely, Gorgeous, Sexy. Don’t I have any of these qualities? May be I should start waxing my legs and doing my eyebrows. And then pose in a mini skirt 😛

Talking of Social Networking, one can hardly avoid Tagging – Sometimes I am tagged with like 50 others, most of whom I don’t even know, in a post which is not even relevant to me. I mean why should I be getting a request to like a page on Women’s lingerie? But still I sometimes ‘like’ if the product is good 🙂

By the way, have you heard of Candy Crush game? My wife used to get multiple requests in a day to play the same. Once she got so irritated that she posted on her timeline “According to recent studies, Candy Crush Saga is responsible for Diabetes in those who play it and Hypertension in those who get its request every now and then.” Since then the number of requests have decreased dramatically.

On LinkedIn, I have seen a new trend. I have noticed multiple posts saying, “If you are looking for a career in Canada, New Zealand, Singapore etc etc, we have multiple roles open – electrical engineers, computer, electronics, mechanical, civil, production, aeronautical engineers etc etc. Please like or comment on this post, so I can review your profile.” Such posts get like 10,000 likes and a couple thousand comments in a matter of minutes. However, I never really understood what all might fit in that ‘etc etc.’ Are there really such companies that can give us any kind of a job anywhere in the world so easily? If so, I would love to go to my dream destination Kazakhstan…please add that also to the post next time, so I can like or comment there 🙂

If you are also on Facebook or LinkedIn, it would be in your best interest to connect with me, because I will definitely ‘like’ or ‘comment’ on your posts every week, even if they don’t make any sense. And i would ‘like’ you to reciprocate 🙂

*It is a fictional article exaggerated to add Humor to it